Friendship groups are rife with politics and the potential to turn nasty. When you put a group of people together, it's easy to get along on a superficial level, but once real personalities start to emerge, it can become difficult to maintain a friendship, particularly when all you initially have in common is one interest, a group you all attend, a business type, or whatever.
But I want to let you into a secret. It's OK to not be part of this.
If you know your friendships are dying then there are lots of ways to break contact, but it needs to be done. Suddenly finding yourself ostracised is very unpleasant and an unhappy place to be, particularly when you didn't realise there was anything wrong. And, it doesn't matter how old we get. We are talked about, ostracised, bitched about; it doesn't change. My mum lives in sheltered housing for the elderly where gossip is rife; I have been in the position where my "friends", and yes, I use the term loosely, have dumped me.
Here are the things to watch out for that tell you the dynamics of your friendship group have changed and it's time to move on:
Bitchiness; when the coven is starting to gather and gossip about other people, and it's making you feel really uncomfortable, it's a sign that things are on the move. Gossip is harmful not just to the subject, but to the participants. Listen to your gut feeling on this, and start to take a step back from it.
Isolation; when friends disapprove of your friendship choices, warning bells should start ringing. We're allowed to make our own choices; they've got no right to move you away from the social circles you've constructed for yourself.
Put downs; remember, a put down is never about you, it's always about them.
The silent treatment; oh come on, are we in nursery school? If I wanted the silent treatment, I'd have stayed married to the ex.
You don't feel good about yourself after you've been in their company; says it all, really...
Give and take; you give, they take; we all know people like this, to some degree; but it's harsh when it's constant and your exciting news NEVER gets a look in, isn't it?
Imitiation; no, it's not the sincerest form of flattery. It's annoying, it's disrespectful, and it is, above all, cheating. When a friends does this to you, particularly if it's with your business or your job, it feels like it negates your hard work. It doesn't really, but it's difficult to understand how a "friend" can do this.
Passive resistance; you know what I mean; when you help out, give advice, etc, and they are deeply unhelpful in return...
There's a theory of group dynamics that shows us that when we get together in a group of people, we're all jostling for position. Who's going to be the Alpha in the group, who tags along, who just happily gets on with it. We settle into the roles that we have fought for, all get along for a while, and then the cracks start to show when we are getting on with being ourselves.
In this situation, the thing to do is to be an adult about this. Unfortunately, Facebook means it's all to easy to "unfriend" (ever had someone put themselves on the "maybe" list for a party you were having, from the "attending" list? Ouch... ) without ever having to make contact, and this seems to permeate through 21st Century life now. We don't break up properly. But if your friendships are doing you harm, it's OK to say it. They'll get over it, and then so will you.
Jumat, 13 Oktober 2017
Rabu, 27 September 2017
Friendship Tattoo Designs - Finding the Absolute Best Artwork Possible
When it comes to friendship tattoo designs, many people give up on finding the best artwork. They end up settling on some random generic designs, simply because that was the only kind of artwork they found. Most of those people regret doing this down the line, which his why it's never a good idea. The good news is that one simple change to how you "search" for friendship tattoo designs can bring you to a world filled with amazing art.
Let me make some more sense of this for you now, because it can be darn easy to accomplish. You can do it in the next twenty minutes if you want to. First things first, though. Let's talk about search engines for a quick second. This is what you "don't" want to use if you plan on getting to galleries that have nice amounts of crisp, high quality artwork for the friendship tattoo designs you're hunting for. Search engines are absolute garage now, because they never include any of the better and larger galleries in their lists. It's just a swimming pool of artwork sites that plops a bunch of generic junk on their pages.
I hate seeing people waste whole days of their life going though mounds of cookie cutter artwork, because the web is a vast place, with many top notch galleries for you to pick friendship tattoo designs. I am about to help you find them right now. You do this by sliding into any big forum you come across. As long as it's big, you will be in business. Two things make big forums so great: Number one, they have all sorts of topics about tattoos in their archives. Number two, they take out every bit of spam and all of the false info that people leave, which means that only the fresh, relevant and honest stuff is left.
That's why they work so well. All you need to do is set aside a couple of minutes to jump in and breeze through some of them. It works like an absolute charm, because a huge amount of knowledge has been shared in there. Names, links and all sorts of info about the great galleries other people have found can be plucked out of here. It's the perfect place for people to chat about their findings and the wonderful artwork collections they've come across, giving you the ultimate way to find original, well drawn friendship tattoo designs. Nothing could be simpler.
Let me make some more sense of this for you now, because it can be darn easy to accomplish. You can do it in the next twenty minutes if you want to. First things first, though. Let's talk about search engines for a quick second. This is what you "don't" want to use if you plan on getting to galleries that have nice amounts of crisp, high quality artwork for the friendship tattoo designs you're hunting for. Search engines are absolute garage now, because they never include any of the better and larger galleries in their lists. It's just a swimming pool of artwork sites that plops a bunch of generic junk on their pages.
I hate seeing people waste whole days of their life going though mounds of cookie cutter artwork, because the web is a vast place, with many top notch galleries for you to pick friendship tattoo designs. I am about to help you find them right now. You do this by sliding into any big forum you come across. As long as it's big, you will be in business. Two things make big forums so great: Number one, they have all sorts of topics about tattoos in their archives. Number two, they take out every bit of spam and all of the false info that people leave, which means that only the fresh, relevant and honest stuff is left.
That's why they work so well. All you need to do is set aside a couple of minutes to jump in and breeze through some of them. It works like an absolute charm, because a huge amount of knowledge has been shared in there. Names, links and all sorts of info about the great galleries other people have found can be plucked out of here. It's the perfect place for people to chat about their findings and the wonderful artwork collections they've come across, giving you the ultimate way to find original, well drawn friendship tattoo designs. Nothing could be simpler.
Kamis, 14 September 2017
How to Create a Beautiful Friendship
A beautiful friendship is one that will enable people to enjoy all the pleasures that are brought about by friends. However, to create a beautiful friendship, you need to go an extra mile to really achieve what you desire in this regard. There are several things that you can do to spruce up your relationships to make sure that they are beautiful. The first thing is to be aware of the kinds of friends you have. There are so many people who are not sure of their friends. Friends should never be imposed on you and it is time you really considered the people you call friends. A friend is a person who is close to you and loves you. They are people who are concerned about you. They will be there when you are sad as well as when you are celebrating. For this reason, you will need to cut off some friendships in your life to pave way for real friends. In society, a huge chunk of friends are those that are benefitting from their friends in one way or the other.
Friends will benefit from each other in a beautiful friendship but, their motivations will not be selfish or malicious. This is the big difference. It is vital for you to eliminate bad friends if you really want a beautiful friendship. There are several other things that you should consider to ensure that people around you are good. You can never fully know the character of a person; faith and trust in them help us to cope with them. Use your instincts to guide you know the real character of friends around you. You can also observe their behavior and you will get to learn about them. This step is vital because nothing beautiful can breed out of a relationship that is based on a fragile foundation in this regard. Once you are comfortable with people you call friends, it is time to work on making the relationship beautiful.
A beautiful friendship is one that friends will have fun together. It really does not matter what age the friends are but, they should always come together for laughs. When it comes to problems, they should be the first people to offer help where it is needed. There is no point in having a friend who will not be there for you when you need them most. All beautiful unions of friendships are based on mutual trust. The trust comes with time and so does respect for each other. Your friends will earn that respect and as years go by, you will learn how to cherish them. One thing that you should always keep in mind is that you will always get friends who are just like you. Make sure that you can make a good friend for friends to love you. To create superb friendships, find time to spend with each other. Like any other relationships, you need to know each other better so that you can appreciate each other more.
Friends will benefit from each other in a beautiful friendship but, their motivations will not be selfish or malicious. This is the big difference. It is vital for you to eliminate bad friends if you really want a beautiful friendship. There are several other things that you should consider to ensure that people around you are good. You can never fully know the character of a person; faith and trust in them help us to cope with them. Use your instincts to guide you know the real character of friends around you. You can also observe their behavior and you will get to learn about them. This step is vital because nothing beautiful can breed out of a relationship that is based on a fragile foundation in this regard. Once you are comfortable with people you call friends, it is time to work on making the relationship beautiful.
A beautiful friendship is one that friends will have fun together. It really does not matter what age the friends are but, they should always come together for laughs. When it comes to problems, they should be the first people to offer help where it is needed. There is no point in having a friend who will not be there for you when you need them most. All beautiful unions of friendships are based on mutual trust. The trust comes with time and so does respect for each other. Your friends will earn that respect and as years go by, you will learn how to cherish them. One thing that you should always keep in mind is that you will always get friends who are just like you. Make sure that you can make a good friend for friends to love you. To create superb friendships, find time to spend with each other. Like any other relationships, you need to know each other better so that you can appreciate each other more.
Jumat, 25 Agustus 2017
3 Tips to Remember When Looking For Friendship Tattoo Designs
It's not that friendship tattoo designs are very difficult to find. It's just that is can be hard to pin point the "quality" ones out there. It might take a while to find them, but most people will settle on a design of far less quality way before they end up getting to the good ones. Rushed decisions are never a good idea when getting tattooed, so I put together a couple of tips to help you find good friendship tattoo designs.
The first tip is just a follow up to what I just stated. You should always, always take your time when looking for tattoos online. This may seem like basic common sense, but so many men and women are still making impulse decisions when picking tattoos. Hey run to get them inked and many of these people end up regretting what they got.
The second tip is one that you might have already noticed. It has to do with search engines and why they can hamper your ability to locate good friendship tattoo designs. Sure, you can use them to find a slew of tattoos, but most of the galleries that pull up in the results are low end places that have nothing but generic, nine year old artwork.
I am sure you can find a diamond in the rough if you look hard enough, but again, most people will not take the time to actually sift through that much artwork to get decent friendship tattoo designs. Most of the galleries that pull up in search engine results will have the same exact tattoos as about one hundred other galleries, which makes it even harder to find the quality friendship tattoo designs out there.
The third tip is just going to help you seek out a new avenue to locate the tons of good galleries you ay have been missing out on. You can do this by implementing internet forums into the equation. Forums (the bigger ones) are always sizzling with topics revolving around tattoos. You can use these topics to find out exactly where other guys and girls are finding their great tattoos. People are always sharing links to the galleries that they have fond and you can simply scoop them up to uncover some great friendship tattoo designs.
The first tip is just a follow up to what I just stated. You should always, always take your time when looking for tattoos online. This may seem like basic common sense, but so many men and women are still making impulse decisions when picking tattoos. Hey run to get them inked and many of these people end up regretting what they got.
The second tip is one that you might have already noticed. It has to do with search engines and why they can hamper your ability to locate good friendship tattoo designs. Sure, you can use them to find a slew of tattoos, but most of the galleries that pull up in the results are low end places that have nothing but generic, nine year old artwork.
I am sure you can find a diamond in the rough if you look hard enough, but again, most people will not take the time to actually sift through that much artwork to get decent friendship tattoo designs. Most of the galleries that pull up in search engine results will have the same exact tattoos as about one hundred other galleries, which makes it even harder to find the quality friendship tattoo designs out there.
The third tip is just going to help you seek out a new avenue to locate the tons of good galleries you ay have been missing out on. You can do this by implementing internet forums into the equation. Forums (the bigger ones) are always sizzling with topics revolving around tattoos. You can use these topics to find out exactly where other guys and girls are finding their great tattoos. People are always sharing links to the galleries that they have fond and you can simply scoop them up to uncover some great friendship tattoo designs.
Senin, 07 Agustus 2017
Christian Friendship - How to Keep Guilt and Neglect From Damaging Your Relationships
Cultivating and nurturing good Christian friendship is an important part of Catholic spiritual growth. But there are some influences in our lives that make it difficult for us to keep our friendships healthy. Neglect is one of the deadliest friendship-killing influences - and unfortunately one of the most common.
Hey - it happens, right? We get busy. Months go by and we don't talk or write. Eventually we even stop emailing. But we comfort ourselves with the thought that when we finally get back together we'll pick up with our friends right where we left off. And with some friendships, that can be true... for a while.
But the faithfulness at the foundation of a true friendship is built up by a myriad of small occasions for displaying affection and expressing commitment through tiny acts of service. These tiny acts happen through the gift of time.
The problem is that once the guilt hits about the distance that has come between us, we continue to keep our distance, refusing to face the guilt. We wait for the great occasion for making up for lost time. Sometimes that moment comes. Other times we just keep waiting. What a distanced relationship really needs is immediate and frequent doses of little moments. Start with a card or an email. Get together for lunch or a coffee. Don't wait for an "event." Just do it.
My wife and I are horrible offenders here. We recently moved, leaving a number of close friends behind. Immediately my wife started telling people, "We're really bad at distance relationships, but we'll try to keep in touch." The debilitating guilt was already present before we were even guilty of neglecting our friends. So when life takes over and we actually do neglect our friends, the guilt is already active. So we start looking for opportunities for the big reunion. But all it would really take is an email.
Look, occasional neglect happens. Get rid of the guilt. Just fix it.
Now, if neglect of friends is a pattern for you, you may need to find the cause and deal with it. For example, people with a sanguine temperament are prone to neglect their friends in favor of being social butterflies. Of course, neglect can also happen due to pain or conflict or a number of other factors. The point is that whatever the cause of neglect of our friends, we need to take care of it.
Fortunately for us, the love of friendship is a skill that we can learn. We can learn relationship skills that help us to complement those who differ from us and to see the gifts in others.
Hey - it happens, right? We get busy. Months go by and we don't talk or write. Eventually we even stop emailing. But we comfort ourselves with the thought that when we finally get back together we'll pick up with our friends right where we left off. And with some friendships, that can be true... for a while.
But the faithfulness at the foundation of a true friendship is built up by a myriad of small occasions for displaying affection and expressing commitment through tiny acts of service. These tiny acts happen through the gift of time.
The problem is that once the guilt hits about the distance that has come between us, we continue to keep our distance, refusing to face the guilt. We wait for the great occasion for making up for lost time. Sometimes that moment comes. Other times we just keep waiting. What a distanced relationship really needs is immediate and frequent doses of little moments. Start with a card or an email. Get together for lunch or a coffee. Don't wait for an "event." Just do it.
My wife and I are horrible offenders here. We recently moved, leaving a number of close friends behind. Immediately my wife started telling people, "We're really bad at distance relationships, but we'll try to keep in touch." The debilitating guilt was already present before we were even guilty of neglecting our friends. So when life takes over and we actually do neglect our friends, the guilt is already active. So we start looking for opportunities for the big reunion. But all it would really take is an email.
Look, occasional neglect happens. Get rid of the guilt. Just fix it.
Now, if neglect of friends is a pattern for you, you may need to find the cause and deal with it. For example, people with a sanguine temperament are prone to neglect their friends in favor of being social butterflies. Of course, neglect can also happen due to pain or conflict or a number of other factors. The point is that whatever the cause of neglect of our friends, we need to take care of it.
Fortunately for us, the love of friendship is a skill that we can learn. We can learn relationship skills that help us to complement those who differ from us and to see the gifts in others.
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